British Civil Defense Film readies populace for Zombie Invasion

Another old Civil Defense film on preparing for zombie outbreaks.

You'd Better Not Pout. You'd Better Not Cry...

Recently leaked films from a Finnish export firm show the truth behind Santa Claus. It isn't pretty, and if you're under the age of 12, I strongly advise you to tune out now.

This old and revered business, Rare Exports Inc., has been engaged in the grey market trade of shipping actual "Father Christmases" world-wide since 1739. Or... so they claim.

The first film appears to be a sales film, showing how Lapp hunters track and bring down a free range Father Christmas before training the beast to deal with children in an appropriate manner.

The second film, however, demonstrates the dangers of improper care and handling of the purchased Father Christmas.

Add one more dangerous, supernatural beast to your hunting list. And as an aside: What is going on in Scandinavia? Lately we've learned of trolls in Norway, and now "Father Christmas" cryptids running loose in Finland. What's next, dragons?

Apparel

Look, you can't go hunting zombies in your birthday suit. Personally, I recommend motorcycle racing leathers as outerwear for hunting because of the durability. But you needs something a little more comfortable next to your delicate skin.


So, some T-shirts for your base layer, or for lounging around your bunker:

Major League Zombie Hunter T-Shirt, available from Zazzle along with an assortment of related designs.

Also cool is the new Doomsday Damsel licensed from Bawidamann by 7.62Designs

I'm sure she looks familiar to our regular readers. You can bet Flint and I already have our T-Shirts and proudly wear them as often as possible between washes.

Caught on Film in Louisiana

This unexplained image recently started making the rounds on the Internet. One of my sources tracked its origin to the Wildgame Innovations Facebook page. (Don't ask how I work my magic; a good magician never reveals his secrets.)

The photo created enough of a stir to make it onto a Louisiana television morning news show.

Now, for some reason, these ladies are skeptical. But it bears a striking resemblance to other footage floating around the internet.

So, what are these things? Zombies? Maybe, but they look different to me. Aliens? I doubt it. Why would aliens cross vast interstellar distances to wander around our backwoods naked? Ghouls? More likely.

But whatever they are... I bet I can kill them with fire.

There's more things to worry about out there...

Oh sure, if you're like me and Flint, you spend every spare moment worrying about the coming Zombigeddon and making sure you're prepared for it.

But we need to consider that the walking dead are not the only possible threat we face. One group of intrepid documentarians in Norway recently released their hard-earned footage of a threat unique to their environment: Trolls.

Folks, I don't know about you, but this concerns me. I don't think the manportable firepower I cache against the unholy resurrection of the corpses of my friends, relatives, and fellow citizens would even begin to dent one of those monstrosities. What do I need to stash? An RPG? A recoilless rifle? LAW rockets?

Sharpen Yer Aim!

Tactical Tailor has a set of three different zombie themed targets for you to practice your firearm skills. Remember, only head shots count!

Check out all the great tactical gear available at that website too! You need something to haul all your food, ammo, water and medical supplies.

Zombie Awareness -- An Educational Film

Remember those awesome instructional films you saw in Hygiene class or Driver's Ed? You ever wonder why they don't have films like that on really important topics, like zombie survival? Guess what? They do have them!

Zombie Awareness -- An Educational Film

When Zombies Attack (1959)

What to do in a Zombie Attack!